What To Do & What Not To Do When Considering Divorce
What you do and how you handle yourself during the typical 2 to 7 year "incubation period" leading up to a divorce can go a long way toward determining the type of divorce you will have. Read this article for the some dos and don'ts to guide your behavior while considering a divorce. read more
Dating While Divorcing
If you are going through a divorce and yearn for some pleasant company for a change, read this article to learn about the pitfalls of dating while getting divorced. read more
“Bad” Spouses Are Rarely Punished. Getting On With Your Life Is The Prize in Most Divorces.
Trying to "punish" your spouse during the divorce for all the ills of your married life can be time-consuming, expensive and emotionally exhausting, but rarely worth the price you'll pay. Family Court judges have "heard it all" and unlikely to extract a significant price upon the misbehaving spouse. With rare exceptions, most property splits are still 50/50. read more
Should You Share The Same Home While Getting a Divorce?
Whether someone should stay in the marital home, or leave, before or during a divorce has nothing to do with whether that person will give up his or her right to the home. Instead, this decision should be based upon much more practical considerations. read more
A Legal Separation Disassembles A Marriage, But Doesn’t End It
Why do some couples choose a legal separation instead of a divorce?What is the difference between a legal separation and a divorce? And, if one spouse really wants a divorce, can they "contest" the other spouse's plea for a legal separation? Find the answer to these questions and more in this article. read more
How To Reduce The Trauma and the Expense of a Divorce
Learn how you can lower the "volume", nastiness, and cost of a divorce through our pioneering approach called the ConstructiveDivorce. read more
Tips For Staying The Course When Divorcing A Controlling Spouse
Trying to divorce a controlling spouse can be very difficult and destructive. Some of my best counsel is outside, strictly speaking, the practice of law and focused on supporting and nurturing my client as they try to break away. read more
Bankruptcy and Divorce
If bankruptcy is on the horizon, couples should file for and complete bankruptcy before getting divorced. read more
Rules For Residing With Your Spouse While Getting A Divorce
If you are divorcing, but can't afford to live apart from your soon-to-be ex-spouse, here are simple rules for how to co-exist peacefully. read more
Making An Early Settlement Offer Key To Reducing The Timeline & Cost of Divorce
Knowing your own "bottom line" about what you would need to settle your divorce case can be the key to moving onto the next stage of your life with your finances and emotions preserved, and at the earliest opportunity as well. read more
Divorce Presents Many With The Opportunity For Fresh Start
Cynthia Fox writes about how divorce, and more specifically the ConstructiveDivorce, is an opportunity for each of her clients to lay the foundation for the next stage of their lives. Read some case histories that describe how past clients have restructured their lives...in large ways and small...after divorce. read more
When Spouses Live In Different States, Winding Up a Marriage Can Be Complicated
Can a couple have divorce actions proceeding in two states at the same time? Read how in this article and what issues would be subject to the jurisdiction of the two different states. read more
Divorce Cases Should Be Set Early and Automatically To Speed Up The Process
Divorce cases linger on far longer than they should often because one or both of the lawyers involved delay preparing their cases until the judge sets it for trial. Yet, judges often refuse to set a case for trial until they have exhausted the possibility of a settlement. However, most lawyers won't negotiate a settlement until they've worked up their case. How should the court break up this logjam? Read the article to learn more. read more
“Loose Lips”: Close Friends and Some Therapists Can Be Forced To Reveal Your Secrets in a Divorce Trial
If you are in the throes of a divorce be very careful about who you confide to about your troubles. They could be called to the witness stand and compelled to testify about what you told them. Save these most private "confessions" for those that cannot be compelled to testify, such as your lawyer, your spiritual advisor or clergy person or a licensed counselor. And, to insure that the communication remains privleged, unburden yourself only in a private setting where you are seeking their counsel, not at a cocktail party. read more
Catholics Can Divorce. The Church Might Even Dissolve The Marriage For You
Read what a St. Louis Catholic Church authority has to say about legal separation and Catholicism. Is it okay for Catholics to legally separate? What should a Catholic do if their spouse asks the court to convert the legal separation into a divorce? read more
Marital Annulment or Dissolution Are Options Available To Some Catholics
"Divorce is not, in itself, morally wrong in eyes of the Catholic Church" according to a leading authority from the St. Louis Catholic Archdiocese. In fact, the Catholic Church will dissolve, not just annul, the marriage of some Catholics under certain circumstances. Read this article to learn more about these and other surprising revelations. read more
The Catholic Church’s Process For Annulling a Marriage Is Much Like A Civil Trial
In any given year, the St. Louis Catholic Archdiocese receives about 800 applications for annulment and grants a little over half of them. What are the church's criteria for granting an annulment and how does it decide if any given marriage meets that criteria? Read the article to learn more. read more
Although Rare Today, Civil Annulments Were Once a Popular Alternative To Divorce
Civil annulments, although rare today, were more prevalent in Missouri prior to 1973, when the state legislature made Missouri a "no fault" divorce state. Read this article and learn about how an annulment might be granted today and the disadvantages of an annulment versus a divorce. read more
Bradley’s Sad Tale: When Love Is Not Enough
Although I am often asked how to assess if a marriage can be saved, I have never come up with any hard and fast criteria. Until now. Read the sad story of Bradley and Sophie to learn more. read more
Free Assistance in St. Louis County For Do-It-Yourself Divorces Without Lawyers
In the St. Louis County courthouse, on the first floor, those wanting to obtain a divorce can obtain all the forms they will need from the Resource Center. The forms are free and once completed can be filed with Judge Dennis Smith, who presides over the county's pro se docket. But, as Judge Smith warns, divorce can be complicated and most people still should seek the guidance of a qualified attorney in preparing the forms. read more
How Do You Divorce Someone That Goes AWOL and Can’t Be Found?
Here is what you need to do in order to get a divorce from a spouse that cannot be found. In-person service of your summons on your spouse is usually best, but "service by publication" is the alternative when in-person service cannot be achieved. read more
Getting Back Your Former Name After Divorce Can Be Easy
Anyone, male or female, can go to court and change their name so long as the name change is not to serve some illegal purpose. For a woman going through a divorce that wants to go back to their former name, the process is particularly easy. Just check the box provided on the divorce judgment. read more
Sometimes It Is Better To Exit a Marriage as an Heir Rather Than As an “Ex”
Read this interesting story about a Missouri woman whose husband died 5 days after the conclusion of their divorce trial, but before the judge had issued his ruling on the divorce. The woman, now a widow, decided that she would do better as her husband's heir, rather than as his "ex". However, her divorce judge wouldn't cooperate and attempted to revise the record...claiming his failure to dissolve the marriage was a clerical error...and ruled that the marriage had been dissolved before the husband passed on. Read what the Missouri Court of Appeals had to say when the wife took her case to them. read more
Parties in Divorce Trials Before Commissioners Have Less Time To Appeal
The St. Louis County Family Court has both judges, appointed by the Governor, and commissioners, appointed by the local circuit court, to hear divorce cases. For some mysterious reason, the Missouri legislature has provided litigants being divorced by a commissioner 15 fewer days to file a motion for a new trial than those appearing before a judge. read more
Wife Divorces Husband Without His Knowledge
Talk about being "blind-sided"! This Missouri man was served with divorce papers, but even before he had time to file his answer with the court, his wife offered to reconsile and moved back in with him. Thinking his wife had dropped or withdrawn her petition, the husband never responded. Unknown to him, his wife had kept the case active while still co-habitating. Guess what happened to him when his divorce finally came to trial and he was not there to speak up for himself. It was not pretty. read more
Man Secretly Divorced Has Options For Getting His Marriage Reinstated
This article follows up on the prior story about the man "secretly" divorced by his wife and describes the options he would have for "undoing" the divorce. read more
Details and Divorce Go Together Like, Well, Love and Marriage
Have you heard the phrase, "the devil is in the details"? Well, read how failing to attend to the details made it "hell" for three different spouses...all men coincidently... in their divorces. read more